Whether you are curious about swinging or have someone specific in mind you would like to involve in your threesome, introducing a new partner into your relationship can be tricky. Here are some steps you should follow to make sure you go about it the right way and achieve maximum satisfaction for everyone involved.
Build a Foundation
First and foremost, you need to have built a strong foundation with your existing partner. The best time to experiment is when you are both feeling happy and secure in your relationship and want to spice things up in the bedroom. Introducing a third partner is not going to help you overcome existing marital problems or strengthen a relationship that has no foundations, so make sure you are a happy twosome first.
Be open and honest about your fantasy and what you want from a threesome. Your partner may feel inadequate or scared that you will stray when you first raise the topic, so reassurance is important. Let your partner know why you want to introduce someone else into your relationship and why you think it will improve your existing relationship.
Raise the Suggestion Slowly
Going straight in with a question such as ‘I want a threesome, would you be up for it?’ while you are waiting for the bus will probably not get you anywhere you want to go, at least as far as your relationship is concerned. However, expressing your innermost sexual desires while you are both in the mood can be a subtle way to let your partner know what you are fantasising about, and you are more likely to get a positive response. Many couples start by experimenting with cam sex. This allows you to act out your threesome fantasy without the pressure of someone else being there physically. Websites such as babestationcams.com offer a variety of girls who are willing to indulge in live cam sex and will help you to turn your fantasies into a reality. Some offer free cam sex so that you can try before you buy, and this can give you a great introduction to the threesome or swinging world in a safe environment.
Picking the Right Match
Again, treading gently here is your best option. It may be that you have always fancied your partner’s sibling or best friend from school, but these suggestions are not likely to get a positive response. If your partner seems open to the suggestion of introducing someone else into your relationship, it is a good idea to ask them who they might like that someone else to be. They might have someone in mind or be open to a gentle suggestion. However, you may decide that a swinging site or club would be a better option as it allows you a degree of anonymity.
Learn from Someone Who Does It
As with anything else, learning from someone who already does it and can act as a mentor to you is a good option. Whether you know anyone you can ask for advice or need to take to the internet to find someone willing to be open and honest about their experiences, you will be able to learn a lot from them. Take some time to find out where to go to find the best partners – perhaps there is a regular hangout or contact site that you could use. You could also pick up some great tips on keeping your relationship on track and dealing with emotions such as jealousy while experimenting.
Keep It Fun
The only way to really enjoy sex is to have fun doing it, and if you want to add another dimension to your existing relationship, this is important. Talk about what you and your partner both want from the experience or experiences you will have, as well as the best way to make sure you both have fun experimenting. It may be a good idea to set some ground rules here, such as how to decide if one of you wants to leave the situation before things get started, whether you will experiment with one partner or multiple, and if there is anything that is off limits.
The best ways to stay healthy are to always use protection and make sure you are tested for STIs regularly. Most seasoned swingers follow these rules to make sure they stay safe, and many clubs or gatherings will not let you play unless you have followed all the safety precautions. Be prepared by carrying condoms with you and keeping up to date with health checks.
Follow these rules to get the best experience when you introduce another partner to your relationship, and you will find that this experience can be a lot of fun.