How Effective Is Your And Your Partner’s Sexual Communication?

There’s a strong connection between honest communication and a healthy relationship, even when it comes to one’s sex life. More often than not, people may find it difficult to share their sexual desires and sexual fantasies with their partner out of fear of getting judged or even because they’re embarrassed to share these fantasies.

However, multiple studies have shown that honest conversations are an essential component of healthy romantic relationships. Kinks are nothing but activities or scenarios that turn you on and should always be celebrated rather than shamed. If you’re wondering how to talk about the kinks and desires, here are some tips on strengthening your sexual communication.

5 Ways To Talk About Your Kinks And Desires With Your Partner

Create A Safe Space

Any conversation about your and your partner’s sexual pleasure should be discussed in a safe space. Whether you feel comfortable holding hands and taking a walk outdoors or want to sit in the comfort of your living room while discussing your kinks and desires, choose something that fits you both.

Another aspect of creating a safe space involves being emotionally open and upfront with your partner. Being respectful and considerate of their feelings and desires can help you both improve your sexual relationship through consistent communication.

Use ‘I’ Statements

When sharing your desires or expectations, it’s important to use a polite manner. Never accuse your partner of not doing something, as it can make them feel defensive, and the conversation won’t be productive. Instead, use ‘I’ statements to express your feelings and any specific kinks that you want to incorporate into your sexual activities.

For instance, if you want to experiment with a flat-chested sex doll, you could use the following statement to express your desire. “I want to incorporate more sex toys in our bedroom experience and would like to know your opinion on it.” This gives your partner an opportunity to understand your desires while also giving them an opportunity to express what they’re comfortable with.

Listen To Understand

An important part of healthy communication about sex involves listening more than you speak and listening intently. Instead of focusing on your response, take some time to sit with your partner and listen to what they want. Do they want to share any kinks and fantasies that they have in bed, or do they want to feel more emotionally close to you?

Being present and open to your partner’s suggestions, whether they’re related to mutual sexual pleasure or lack of intimacy, can help you foster a stronger connection with your partner. If you feel like effective communication can be achieved by hiring a sex coach or reading about sex toys online, consider discussing this with your partner to see if they’re interested.

Consent Is Essential

While kinks and desires are nothing to be ashamed of and can even strengthen your sexual connection with your partner, they need consent. Sometimes you and your sexual partner will be on the same page about how you want to explore your sex life and take care of your sexual health, but at other times, you might be at a crossroads about what to do.

That’s when it’s essential to focus on doing things that you and your partner both agree on enthusiastically. For example, if you want to start experimenting with BDSM in the bedroom, but your partner isn’t ready for something intense, you must never coerce them into doing something that they don’t want. This also goes the other way. If you don’t want to do something in the bedroom, even if you’re in a long-term relationship, your partner can’t force you, and you have all the right to say no.

Check In Regularly

While exploring kinks and desires, it’s easy to take it far from time to time. That’s why you and your partner should always check in with each other after every sexual encounter. Being considerate of how your partner feels during the experimentation can make them feel loved and cared for.

This improves not only your sexual relationship but also life outside the bedroom. Whether you’re planning to try something new or are even in the middle of something, checking how your partner feels about it can make all the difference and improve all the aspects of your relationship.

Final Thoughts

Improving sexual communication is an essential aspect of a healthy relationship. Being able to discuss your kinks and desires with your partner shows trust and commitment to the relationship. If you’re feeling awkward about sharing your desires with your better half, using the five tips given above can make your verbal communication better and enhance your feelings for your partner. Remember to enjoy the process and trust that the person that you’re sharing your desires with deeply cares about you, so don’t be afraid to start the conversation.