10 Most Common Things People Do AFTER Sex

Now what?

You’ve done it. You’ve had sex. Wonderful sex. Reverse cowgirl-ing and missionary-ing and cunnilingus-ing and everything in between. You’ve both been pleasured to the point of a climax and you’re now lying there wondering, what now? Well, we’ve all got our own post-sex activities and routines, however there are 10 that are the most common, and I’ve took it upon myself to share them with you. If I’ve missed any, feel free to give me a proverbial nudge.

Cuddle

Cute. Most people like to lay about post-coitus, probably in a wet patch by this point, just enjoying each other’s naked company. It’s probably the most intimate you’ll feel. All warm and fuzzy, regardless of the puddle on the sheets. Nothing better, right?

Watch TV

Let’s face it, if you’ve experienced a pretty splendiferous orgasm, your brain turns to mush. What better way than to not have to use your brain for the hour or so post-sex than to get tuned into a series on Netflix? I’ll wait…

Hydrate

Lying about with a dry mouth isn’t ideal, so it comes as no surprise that a lot of people choose to get a drink after they’ve had their jollies. Especially if they’ve had ‘other fluids’ in the mouth during said activity. Cheeky monkeys.

Get Dressed

Not everyone’s a massive fan of lying around with their mary (or willy) out. Can’t blame them. Your inhibitions are quickly back in tact after sex so you may feel a little more comfortable with your modesty not on show, by getting dressed.

Spoon

Similar to the previously mentioned cuddle is the classic spoon. Whether he spoons you, or you spoon him, spooning is the art of after-sex togetherness. You probably couldn’t be closer, and if you’ve been making some sweet sweet love, it’s the perfect ending.

Nothing

Sweet nothings, literally. No talk, no food, no moving, just lying and enjoying the moment. Heck, why not even throw a nap into the mix? The chances of you drifting off into a peaceful slumber after some glorious sex are quite high in fact. Doing nothing after sex is great.

Have Deep Conversations

I bloody love a deep and meaningful conversation. I don’t necessarily mean something romantic, more a conversation with serious depth that might result in you lying about for the rest of the day trying to come to the bottom of some crazy conspiracy theory or the likes. It’s thought-provoking, interesting and doesn’t involve moving anything other than your mouth.

Make Food

For those of you have the energy or endeavour to prepare food after sex, I salute you. However, I think we’ve all been there when – post coitus – we’ve developed a certain appetite for something other than a good hard shag. Sandwiches, perhaps.

Order Takeaways

Alternatively, for those who are experiencing hunger yet they cannot be bothered to prepare the food themselves (who can blame them?), a takeaway is a great option. Just run to the door in your dressing gown, receive the goods and try not to get grease on the sheets. Voila. May I be so bold as to recommend a 16-inch pizza?

Go On Social Media

I mean, this one I’m not a fan of. Similarly, I’m not a fan of those who do it either. I mean for goodness sake, carpe diem and enjoy the moment. Eat crappy food from the comfort of your bed, talk about how aliens may have built the pyramids, watch the next episode of Game of Thrones, I’m sure Facebook can wait.

My suggestion? Bugger it, do all 10. Happy humping.