Behold – The Half Night Stand

It has come to my attention that we millennials are really embracing the whole ‘carpe diem’ movement when it comes to courtship and canoodling. Back in the day, it would be monumentally frowned upon if we were to spend a night between with the sheets with another and nothing more. Nowadays, you’d be lucky if someone blinks an eyelid if you told them you spent the whole night shagging with no intentions to see that person again.

Yes, that’s right, I’m talking about one night stands – seemingly meaningless sex, a sleepover and a morning goodbye.

I know, I know, sometimes, they’re not always intentional. You may have sought to find solice rather than just sex in the arms of this person, but low and behold, you get ghosted after the grind, or alternatively, you ghost them. Unfortunately (or fortunately) these things happen, but it’s all one big, huge learning curve I guess. It all boils down to what you’re looking for at that time and whatever you feel is right (I won’t advocate or dismiss anyone’s ideas because hey, it’s your life, live it the way you want to), is fine. There may come a point when you seek nothing but affection and romance, leading to a meaningful relationship, but I can comfortably assure you that there will also be times when you just crave nothing other than a good humping. In fact, we’re all getting a lot more brazen these days – we act boldly and without shame and behold, this has led to the rise of the half night stand.

What is that you ask? Well, in layman’s terms – it’s a one night stand, but you don’t stay the night. Simples. 

Both men and women are adopting this new fangled approach to fornication and by God, it’s taken the nation by storm. We see it all the time in Snapchat stories, we hear it from our friends, sometimes even our family, heck, we even do it ourselves. Our modern attitudes to sex mean that there’s none of that awkward morning after madness. After the deed is done, we simply get up, get dressed, and go home to the comfort of our own beds.

Gone are the days of the walk of shame, welcome the stride of pride!

So how has this even come about? When did we all become so brazen? I can only assume that the increasing popularity of dating apps (such as Tinder) play some part in bringing people together for carefree liaisons, and conventional wisdom does in fact suggest that sex is not an action we take to find true love, in fact nowadays, it’s pretty disposable. I won’t lie, this makes me kinda sad. Even my own experience seems to tell me that more and more people are looking for the one for the night, rather than ‘the one’ for the rest of their life.

Naturally, if sex is the only thing on your agenda, it’s a pretty revolutionary turn up for the books. 

You can show up looking your best, drop your drawers and be satisfied that society is in agreement with your post-coital departure. Is this a good thing though, that we’re having sex and leaving before bed time? Surely I’m not the only girl who’s been left feeling pretty empty after a one-time encounter. Don’t get me wrong, it’s all fun and games when you’re living in the moment, but once that moment is gone, you’re back to square one. If you’re looking for an emotional connection or something more than a one-off sex sesh, would it be wise to leave this off your bucket list? I guess it’s no secret that we’ve all been there and done that, or want to for that matter, but when it comes to feeding our appetites for both love and lust, is a half night stand really the healthy option?

What do YOU think?

love naomi

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  1. Amy Hughes
    February 5, 2016 / 10:06 am

    Love this!!!! so true, things have changed and people dont stay the night anymore. I cant decide if its a good idea all of the time but i suppose if you dont wan a relationship then it could be okay so your feelings arent hurt

    love this naomi!! 🙂 your fab! xxxxx

  2. Jay
    February 5, 2016 / 10:09 am

    Spot on Naomi

  3. February 7, 2016 / 3:11 pm

    THANK YOU FOR THIS POST! It’s a really important subject that’s always ignored. You’re not the only girl to feel empty after a half-night stand! There are chemical reasons why, namely Oxytocin. The reason men don’t get as attached is that Testosterone completely dilutes the bonding effects of Oxytocin. (Which is also why men commit later in life, when their testosterone begins decreasing.)

    I HATE that girls are being fed the lie that we can shag as ruthlessly and with as little investment as boys can. It’s not true, yet we’re made to feel weird and clingy when we get hurt by it. In fact, I wrote a whole book about it, Not Tonight Mr Right, published by Penguin in 2008. It’s on Kindle here: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Not-Tonight-Mr-Right-Girls-ebook/dp/B002RI9K68/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr= I’ll send you a copy if you like? Would LOVE to hear your thoughts. 🙂

    Kate x

  4. February 22, 2016 / 9:28 pm

    OMG this is an awesome writing I love every piece of it…you can also check out mine… olarebj.wordpress.com

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