Spicing up your sex life can come in all forms and of course, when it comes to such things, it’s definitely an each to their own kinda situation. Everyone is completely different – which is fine – and it takes all sorts to push buttons in the bedroom. From the sex toys to the lingerie, from the indoors to the outdoors, I could go on all day about the many ways to deviate from the simply missionary position to get the spark back between the sheets.
However, it has come to my attention that more couples are wanting to create actual memories they can look back on. In this case, no, I’m not talking about a photo scrapbook or a box of titbits to reflect on happy, romantic times. Nope, I’m talking about making videos together… in the bedroom. As seedy as some may think it might sound, it’s actually a pretty normal thing for couples to do these days but naturally, when it comes to home movies, there are some dos and don’ts you’ll want to consider before pressing record.
DON’T Do it if your partner’s not into it
Everyone has different ideas of what’s hot and what’s not. Some may absolutely love the idea of creating their very own “sex tape” (tape? Apologies, I drifted back to the 90s then) whereas others may completely detest the idea. Whatever your partner thinks – that’s okay. If they want to – great – if they don’t, why not explore different ways to spice up your sex life because trust me when I say that there are certainly more ways than one!
DO Set the mood
It sounds cliché but believe me when I say that it’ll make a massive difference, especially if you’re considering making a video for the first time. The last thing you need is an awkward silence in a well-lit room. What you do need is a few flickering candles, music, hey, let’s go all out and get some fresh bedding on. Creating an ambience before getting down to the good stuff will certainly make the good stuff, well, great, and that’ll definitely be worth the watch!
DON’T Put the big light on
We’re humans and naturally we’re all a little self-conscious at times, especially when we’re completely naked so the last thing you need if you’re trying to record a home video is for the spotlight to be on all your nooks and crannys – literally. Dim the lighting – trust me. Not only does this create the mood with the candles flickering in the background but it’ll also have you both lookin’ great while the show goes on.
DO Have consent
It takes two to tango in all situations and that’s the long and short of it. If you’d like to make a home video with your partner, talk about it and make sure you both agree to it. Consent is key when it comes to anything, especially sex. Some people feel comfortable doing one thing, but not another, however if you’re able to communicate and be clear about what you both want to do, then you’re onto a winner.
DON’T film from a funny angle
Think of it this way, when we take a picture, we always have a “good side” and it’s the same when you’re making a video. It’s a kinky keepsake and you want to look (and feel) your best so perhaps have a look at where you’ll set down the camera and how the video will look, you’ll thank me for it. Hell, if you wanna go all out and get professional, invest in a tripod!
DO Dress for the occasion
Remember, you’re creating a memory, a dirty little secret between you and your significant other if you will, so surely you want to look the part? Of course you do! Preparation is key so that you don’t end up wearing your once-was-white-but-now-is-grey bra along with your big ol’ time-of-the-month pants (you know what I’m talking about ladies!) so dig out your sexiest lingerie, get your lippy on and feel fabulous for your film debut.
DON’T Share it with others
Yeah, I know it’s how Kim Kardashian got famous but it’s definitely not something I’d recommend or condone. A home video is for that and that alone – home. It’s for the two of you to enjoy at your leisure, it’s not for the eyes of others. It’s not big and it’s not clever to share personal and intimate images and videos for the world to see so if you’re gonna record a keepsake, keep it to yourself.
DO Forget the camera’s there
When your recording you and your partner having sex, I guess you might feel as if someone is watching and this may put you on edge (or not, depends what you’re into, oo-er) and that added pressure will obviously take your mind off the task at hand – not ideal. When the camera’s on, forget it’s there and enjoy the moment, and – you know – “the rest”.