Did you see the story all over the internet recently? Oh you know which one I’m talking about. This poor girl who wanted nothing more than to spice up her sex life ended up pretty traumatised by the experience. Basically – in short – she got a vibrator stuck up her bum and had to go to hospital to have it surgically removed. Pretty shocking stuff eh? However, surprisingly not as uncommon as you might think.
Couples (and self-satisfying singles for that matter) are constantly seeking out new ways to reach new heights of pleasure in the bedroom, and 9 times out of 10, they reach for the sex toys to do so. Although, it seems a lot of people fail to consider the dil-dos and don’ts (see what I did there) of introducing orgasmic objects into the mix. So, without further ado, fill you boots…
DO Clean your toys
Before AND after you use them, it’s not hard to keep a packet of baby wipes in the same drawers as your box of tricks. You’ll always want to make sure they’re fresh as a daisy and ready to use, because if not, well, I don’t think I need to tell you why.
DON’T Go back to front
I’ll try to not be too graphic when mentioning this point but it’s crucial. Much like I assume you’d never go down on your partner if they’d just entered the back door (if you get my drift), the same applies with sex toys. Stick to one venue at one time, for obvious reasons.
DO Try new ones
Sex toys are all about exploring what makes you tick, or orgasm, however you want to put it, so try a few different ones and find out what really hits the spot for you. Trust me, you might be surprised! From vibrators, to bullets, to plugs, to rings, the list of toys to choose from is endless so treat yo’self.
DON’T Take advice too seriously
When you’re sharing your ideas with your friends, of course listen to what they have to say but remember that your body is different from theirs. Sex toys are pretty personal so only you can decide what’ll push your buttons properly.
DO Have lube to hand
It’s no secret as to why. You want to enhance the experience and if ‘sliding’ in turns to ‘shoving’, you know you’ve got an issue. There’s loads of lovely lubes around so always keep one handy for a sensationally slippery session! (Yes, I said it)
DON’T Give up
Everyone is different, and it takes different things to please people between the sheets, and it’s the same with toys. Sure, one toy might not give you the happy ending but another might give you the best bloody orgasm you’ve ever had so as the old saying goes, if at first you don’t succeed, try and try (a different sex toy) again.
DO Opt for multi-functions
I’m sure you’ll find when you go online or you walk into Ann Summers that some sex toys make monumental claims about multi-stimulation and you know what? They’re bloody brilliant. Sure, if you’re new to using sex toys, work your way up but I guarantee that a multi-purpose toy will be the best investment you’ve made in a looong time.
DON’T Get too carried away
We all like to experiment in the bedroom, for one reason or another, this much is clear. However, make sure if you’re using sex toys, you’ve got your wits about you. I’d highly recommend not being blind drunk or “overly enthusiastic” when spicing up your sex life, because let’s face it, no one wants to end up in A&E with a dildo stuck up their bum.
DO Talk it out with your partner
As with any sexual activity, using toys during sex requires consent so be sure you’ve had a good ol’ chinwag about the pros and cons of introducing a different form of foreplay into the mix. I mean imagine hopping into bed with your lover only to find them sat there with a whopping great dildo and a roguish grin on their face. Chances are you’d run a mile.