I don’t write a lot about my relationship. Sure, to get to where I am now, I went on a hell of a lot of dates to meet my Mr Right and that’s exactly what he is, however every partnership has it’s ups and downs. To be honest, at this stage (touch wood) we get on pretty well but there’s something in particular which has a) forced me to blog and b) made me sit awake at night thinking of different ways of how to kill him and make it look like an accident. Okay, too much, but you get what I mean? It annoys me. What am I talking about?
Snoring. That’s what.
There’s no better feeling than hopping into a king-size bed at night with the gorgeous man you fall in love with over and over again every time you see him, only to have your peaceful slumber disrupted by a sound that can only be compared to industrial power tools, and no matter what you do, you can’t do anything about it. It’s infuriating but the problem is, you can’t get angry because, well, it’s not their fault. They’re totally unaware that they’re doing it but by God, you yourself could not be more aware as you sit rocking back and forth on the bed in the wee small hours of the morning wondering whether you’ll ever sleep again. You kinda feel like you’re the only person this is happening to too. However, I was comforted when I came across a wee survey from Chemist Direct talking about snoring in relationships. Needless to say, I actually read this whilst being kept awake by the noises coming from my big bloke’s mouth.
Did you know that most people would consider physical violence or even a termination of the relationship if their partner’s snoring became too severe?
No? Well you do now and I won’t lie, I definitely fall into that category. The first time it happens, you just brush it off, but the 248th time, that’s when you start searching for an alibi for the crime you plan to commit. Get my drift? Sleep is so precious to us all and anything that’s gets in the way of us and our 40 winks is massively infuriating and frustrating, so it’s no surprise to me that snoring can be considering a big deal breaker in a relationship.
In fact, over 25% of Brits polled said that they have experienced major conflict in their relationship specifically because of snoring. Like I said, your partner isn’t doing it on purpose so you can’t blame them but let’s be honest, when you’re totally sleep deprived and tired and annoyed, you’ve gotta blame someone right? Right. So how do we deal with this, how do we move forward?
Well, as much as we like to think that holding your man’s nose until he chokes himself awake can be sufficient enough, there are actually a lot of snoring “aids” out there. Ladies, try not to lose your temper with your man if he snores, because I’m sure if you pipe up and be like “look love, it’s got to stop or the Playstation’s going in the bath”, he’ll be straight down to the chemist to sort himself out. Slightly drastic but you get my drift? Communicate how this situation is affecting you and if he cares about you, of course he’ll do his best to sort himself out.
So now I guess it’s my turn to go home and be like “Darling…